My Grandmother’s Squint

My Grandfather is in hospice. He is in his very last days.  Every time my phone buzzes or chimes I am expecting to hear the news that he is with the Lord.  Needless to say, he has been on my mind.

I learned an awful lot from Grandpa.  How to fish.  How to count cards.  He was a great role model: he loved God, was faithful to his wives (he remarried ten years after having been widowed), and he served his country (Navy, WWII).  He had a great sense of humor and loved a good practical joke.  And he was wise.  On one occasion, he even gave me a spanking! One thing he taught me made a tremendous impact on me as a young man.

My Grandma, Margaret “Muggs” Egstad (yes, my daughter Maggie is named after her!), was as godly and sweet a woman as I have ever known.  And she was always “put together” as they say in the upper Midwest.  Hats and gloves to church every Sunday.  Matching handbags.  Sensible yet fashionable shoes that coordinate with the dress.  I don’t think I ever made it into church with her around without her taking one of her white gloves off, licking her fingers and trying to tame my hair!  Those were different times.  She always looked her best and, as much as she could help it, so did we.  But Grandma had a squint.  Her right eye was never all the way opened.

Now when I was a boy, I was very self-conscious about my own appearance.  I have large ears.  And they stand perpendicular to the sides of my head.  I have always had freckles.  Did I mention red hair?  And as a boy I used to wonder about my Grandma.  Did she ever pray that her eye would stop squinting?  When she was a little girl, did she ask God to change her appearance?  Did she think about her squint every time someone took her picture?

Well, one day, probably when I was in the neighborhood of eleven or twelve years old, I asked Grandpa about my Grandma’s eye.  I will never forget his response.

Grandpa smiled his widest and told me that Grandma’s eye is the reason he married her.  When he first met her, he thought she was winking at him.  With the confidence provided by his misunderstanding, he began a courtship that resulted in as lovely a romance as you could wish for.  And it began with a squint.

Romans 8:28 teaches us that “God works all things for the good of those who love him.”  This includes things like big ears, red hair, and squints.  And it includes those things that you find so troublesome. A hymn that I have sung since childhood has a verse I have learned to love.  The hymn is “How Firm a Foundation.”  The third verse ends with the lines: “For I will be with you, your troubles to bless; to sanctify to you your deepest distress.”

God sanctifies such things.  He can make what the world calls unsightly the grounds for the greatest romance of the century.  He can do more than we can ask or imagine.  Friend, what troubles you?  I hope it encourages you to know that that thing you so wish were different may soon become the grounds of blessings you have not yet considered.

Grandpa will be in heaven soon.  And it gladdens my heart to see him greeting his Savior.  Then in my mind’s eye, I see him turn to the ever-beautiful Muggs with his winsome smile and give her a wink.

Your Pastor,

Bob Bjerkaas