How do you think about the people with whom God has surrounded you?
“And as her soul was departing (for she was dying), she called his name Ben-oni; but his father called him Benjamin.”
Genesis 35:18
This is the bittersweet description of the birth of a baby. Rachel was the beloved wife of the patriarch Jacob. As she died giving birth to a baby boy, she named him Benoni: “Son of my Sorrow.”[1] But! Jacob named him Benjamin: “Son of the Right Hand.”
Here we have one baby with two names. Rachel in the travails of childbirth and the immanence of her death sees the boy as coming into the world through her sorrow. Jacob, seeing the woman he loved breathe her last chooses to see him as coming into the world through his ‘right hand.’ One name focused on the pain and the sadness the birth occasioned. The name that stuck focused on the honor and strength through which the boy was given.
Both names were equally valid, but only one was authenticated by God’s word. In every place where this child is referenced (and in every reference to the tribe of Israel which bears his name), he is Benjamin. The name Ben-oni is never again mentioned in scripture.
Names are significant. Assigning names to living creatures was among the first tasks given to Adam and Eve – they were to identify the essential qualities or defining characteristics of each animal and name it appropriately (Gen. 2:19). The very first recorded act of Adam, after his redemptive encounter with God in the garden, is to name his wife Eve (Gen. 3:20). Isaiah prophecies that Israel will be given an everlasting (Is. 56:5) and a new (Is. 62:2) name when they are restored. And we are told that in Christ we will be given a new name (Rev. 2:17). Names are significant.
There is a depth to this one short verse in Genesis that invites some pretty deep reflection. Think for a moment about the names – and the nicknames, by which you refer to people. Consider the terms that you apply to them; the manner in which you summarize their essential character – as you see it. Do you see people through the lens of your experiences? Or do you see people as gifts from God himself?
Parents, every day you choose what you will call your children. Spouses, you constantly affirm something about each other with every nickname or adjective you use. Neighbors, friends, and co-workers… you can weigh and measure each other based upon the horizontal values of how they impact you and what you think of their worth; or you can take the vertical route of seeing that they are far more than the grief they may have caused you!
For those of us who follow Christ, we must be doubly sure to take care on this point. Do the descriptions and the names that we attach to others reflect our pained experience of their presence? Or do we consider them in terms that anticipate eternity and the repristination of something made new by God’s powerful grace. When considering others, look for the work of a great and gracious God who is sovereign over your kids’, spouses’, and neighbors’ lives – and be sure to sound like you see God at work around you.
Your Pastor,
Bob Bjerkaas
[1] Although some Bible translations offer the footnote that Benoni could mean “son of my strength,” this interpretation is a stretch. Ben (son) oni (my sorrow) is the plain meaning. Furthermore, Jacob’s renaming is not presented as a synonymous statement, rather as an adversative – as the ESV translation suggests.